Colombia – why I won't go to the Totumo mud volcano

When you look for things to do in the Cartagena area, one thing that inevitably comes up in any search of the area is the Totumo mud volcano.  It is an attraction less than an hour north of the city, and tours going there are plentiful and cheap (even with all the tipping for everyone involved). The apocryphal history behind the volcano is that it used to be a “real” volcano, but a priest put holy water in it and now it’s just mud.

It sounds fun upon a surface look at the experience.  A volcano-shaped mound with a strange density mud in it that you float in and then clean up from in the river nearby.  Like a mud wallow for humans.  Totally something I’d be interested in as being a unique experience.
EXCEPT for a lot of concerns that come up when you actually think about the description of the trip.

This mud volcano seems to have no water circulating through it in any timely manner, and thus, anything that goes in stays in (other than all the mud and gunk that leaves each time a person leaves).  I saw a report of a diaperless baby being in the mud with his/her parents.  I know there’s a ton of sunscreen and sweat etc that ends up in there and is never cleaned.  I just don’t see how this can be sanitary.  And I did notice that in none of the reviews I read were there any locals “enjoying” this attraction. Instead, I read of locals coming to take pictures of the tourists in the wallow.  Several reports mention that the mud smells of manure, sulfur, and other vile scents.

Most reviews mention the inside of the “volcano” as being very small, and there being a large number of people in the mud at the same time, making it less comfortable, and the sheer number of sweaty dirty people going through the small mud hole just increases the contaminant build-up.  Many people mention waiting in line in the sun in a line up rickety stairs to the top of the volcano for 30 minutes to an hour to get into the mud, and then a slippery climb out and back down the stairs to get to the river area.
Additionally, the river you can “clean” yourself up in after is also not likely clean. Illegal mining and cocaine manufacturers (among others) dump their waste in the rivers.  Some people report the water being brackish or discolored and foul-smelling in some reports. Many parasites and bacterial infections in Colombia can be contracted in the freshwater lakes/streams including Leptospirosis and Schistosomiasis.

Not to mention, many women report being uncomfortable being “handled” by the male “massagers” in the mud pit, and the women “cleaners” by the river.

So, yes, it would be an experience, but I don’t think it’s worth the risks and unpleasantness.